The New Normal

How have you been handling lockdown? I'd be really interested to know.

For someone who has borderline fetishised the idea of living in a post-apocalyptic wasteland from time to time, actually existing during a global pandemic is... interesting. I've learned that aspects of my apocalypse plans were good (securing the house, stocking up on tins, generally living within my means and saving money when the going was good) but there was plenty I didn't think of (where I was going to get salad from, where I was going to get organic fresh produce in general from, the fact that six cartons of UHT oat milk only lasts me about 14 days, as it turns out). I'm learning! And I'm getting into hobbies I had barely a passing interest in previously, especially hiking.

I've been hiking a lot in the countryside around my house, following social distancing guidance to the extreme- I'm usually at least two miles from the nearest human being, let alone two metres. I generally enjoy my own company but this much solitude has taken some getting used to.

I get a strange feeling when I'm out walking and see someone else in the distance. I feel like I'm in Walking Dead or Survivors.

I started hiking in my oldest pair of boots, which promptly fell to bits, so then I had to start wearing my Kurt Geiger motorcycle boots 🙈 which are okay for a few miles, but doing 10.5 miles in them the other day nearly killed my feet. If only I had someone to massage them for me!!

But anyway... If any of my subscribers happen to be into hiking/ rambling and can recommend a good brand of hiking boots, I'd love to hear from you! Louboutin don't do them, so I'm stumped 😉 My Amazon wishlist is looking pretty hilarious atm... Gone are the days of listing £200 bottles of champagne and £75 candles. Now it's all about the long-life food supplies (both for me and my cat), the little homewares, and the meditative/ feel-good books to help stop me going insane 🙃

Through hiking in the springtime, I've also got interested in wildflowers- they just seem to jump out at me and I naturally want to stop and study all the ones I'm not familiar with or haven't seen before, i.e. most of them. I must try to find out if there's a good app I can use to ID them, or be old-fashioned and buy a book. Here's some pics I took on my hikes. If you know what any of them are, lmk and I'll update the captions :)

 ???

 Wild garlic

 Wild strawberry

 ???

 Okay... so even I know what these are!

 Some sort of yellow flowering nettle??...

... Don't know.

???

 ???

 Primrose

 Bluebell

Tongue ferns!

Buttercup/ bug nursery

Thank you thank you thank you to the three clients who have supported and/ or continue to support me financially through this unforseeable crisis, including by paying for post-lockdown dates in advance. I won't ever forget it 💋 I am living very simply day to day, but because of you I can at least afford the aforementioned organic produce deliveries, and possibly even a good pair of hiking boots at some point. "Little" things that can trick me into seeing lockdown as a retreat rather than a jail term. I will always be grateful.

I am a kinky escort and luxurious dating companion based in Central London. I like vintage glamour, food, 5* hotel rooms and champagne cocktails.

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