A Client's Guide to Avoiding Fake "Escort" Scams

I put up an AMA post on Reddit recently and someone asked how to avoid getting scammed- it was the one thing holding him back from leaping into the luxurious pleasure of booking an Escort. It could have been holding him back for years! I found I had several suggestions to make so I decided to collate them all into a blog. If I think of anything further, I will update :)

Avoiding scams is a topic that comes up again and again on social media, usually in reference to "clients" who refuse to screen or send a deposit because they say they are afraid of being scammed.

I put "clients" in quotation marks because you're not really a Client unless you actually meet Escorts, and of course you can't actually meet Escorts if you don't follow their screening procedures. So really, they are much better described as men who stay home and repeatedly cock-block themselves out of fear.

Firstly, I would like to reassure any potential Client reading this that if you are reasonably sober and sensible, you will probably never be scammed.

I have been meeting Clients for years, most of whom have far more experience than I do, and have never ever had one mention being scammed. I'm sure it happens, but I don't think it's particularly common. However, it is still perfectly understandable to want to stack the odds in favour of it never happening to you.

What kind of "scams" are we talking about? The ones I can think of are:

  • you send an "escort" a deposit and then never hear from them again.
  • you book a date with an "escort" who then blackmails you instead of meeting you.
  • you meet an "escort" at her home, except instead of an escort, there is a gang of men waiting for you who rob you.

Notice I am also putting "escort" in quotation marks. An Escort by definition is someone who honestly and openly dates for money, which is perfectly legal in Britain, but they are obviously not who we are talking about here. A person who steals money is a thief, a person who blackmails is a blackmailer and a gang who rob you are muggers, all of which are completely illegal and should be reported to the police. So who we're really talking about is thieves, blackmailers and muggers, and how to avoid them.


The most important step is the first one: doing your research, which is a fancy way of saying reading.

If you can read, you will probably never be scammed.

Read the Escort's own personal website, all of it, not just the directory listings and online adverts you found on Google. 

Directory listings can be a convenient way to discover new people's websites, but may also be years out of date, or even auto-generated and not posted by the lady in question at all. They are fun to browse but do find the lady's personal .com or .co.uk website to ensure you are getting accurate, up to date information. Most also have a Twitter/ Instagram/ OnlyFans and/ or a blog you can peruse.

If they have gone to the effort and expense of building and maintaining their own website and have been blogging or posting regularly on social media for months or even years then they are almost certainly a real person. The guys who e-mail you saying that you've won the lottery do not go to that much effort.

Step 2: See if she's verified on any directories

Some websites like Tryst will tell you on a lady's profile that she has been "verified", which means a staff member has checked her ID and judged it to be her in her photos. Sadly, there is no equivalent feature for Clients, which is why many Escorts have to ask you to e-mail them your photo ID directly. Perhaps it is time we started asking websites like Tryst to allow Clients to verify too!

Not all legitimate Escorts get verified, not least because some websites charge for the privilege or report our IDs to US Immigration so we can’t go on holiday (!)- but it's something.

Example of a verified profile (mine!) on Tryst.

Step 3: See if she has any AdultWork feedback

If the lady you are interested in has an AdultWork profile, read her feedback from confirmed Clients that have actually met her. It is just like eBay. This is more reliable than anonymous forums where anyone can post fake reviews- negative as well as positive- and it is impossible to know if they are real Clients, fantasists, or scammers.

Not everyone is on AdultWork of course, but it doesn't hurt to look.

Step 4: Do the communications sound professional?

I would feel instantly reassured that I was doing the right thing by the perfect balance of friendliness and professionalism in an Escort’s communications with me. Having done my research, I would send all my screening information in the first message if possible and would be very put off by someone who never asked for any, or by a seemingly new lady with adorable pictures and inexplicably low rates.


Someone could be desperate to meet for perfectly valid financial reasons, but there is a chance that the reason they don't seem at all picky about who they date is because they are actually looking for potential victims. Muggers are not picky and do not need you to screen.

If you send a politely worded initial enquiry and receive a torrent of unsolicited sex chat in return- hit pause. I have never met a genuine sex worker who wants to extensively talk dirty for free. If they seem desperate to turn your head with an unexpected deluge of dirty talk, it might be because they are trying to distract you from noticing other things, like a lack of normal screening procedure.

Step 5 (optional): Ask if she offers paid phone chat or webcamming

If the lady you are interested in offers a phone chat or webcamming service, you can hear her voice and/ or see her live for yourself before meeting with very little risk. It’s also a nice way to break the ice so you feel more familiar upon meeting.

Step 6: Always meet in a public place

Suggest meeting your date in a comfortable (indoor!) public place such as a nice cocktail/ coffee bar or restaurant, instead of meeting in private straight away. The hotel bar will do fine. When she arrives, you will be able to see for yourself that she is a real lady and not a gang of men about to mug you. 

However, if you still get a bad feeling and your gut tells you to bail, discreetly hand her the envelope and go. Pretend to get an urgent text message if you need to. You are obliged to pay her consideration for the time you booked, but you are not obliged to stay or have any kind of sexual or private interaction with anyone you are not comfortable with. A truly high-class Escort will understand. You can always rebook another time if you regret your decision.

What not to do: Ask for a free video call or free selfies

It is lazy, it is obnoxious, it is a security risk (especially for providers who do not publish photos or videos of their faces or voices) and perhaps more dangerously it makes you look like you don't know what you're doing, because it is unnecessary if you have already followed the above steps.

In the unlikely event that a provider agrees to see you after you've made this ill-mannered request, you will have made a horrible first impression that will be difficult to come back from- except possibly with extensive tipping and gifts! Better to just not do it in the first place.

What not to do: Be unrealistic 

If you have researched an Escort with a well-written personal website stocked with plenty of photos (not just a directory listing), who:

  • is verified on one or more platforms
  • has 100% positive feedback on AdultWork
  • has a regularly updated Twitter/ Instagram/ OnlyFans profile
  • has blog posts dating back years
  • communicates professionally
  • does not appear too good to be true
ask yourself how realistic it is that she would throw away her hard-earned reputation, glamorous career and quite possibly a six-figure income to make off with your relatively small deposit.

Would your deposit be enough for a person to realistically retire on and start a new life?

What not to do: Freak out

Establishing trust is a normal step along the path to sexual intimacy. If the thought of losing a deposit or being blackmailed frightens you beyond reason, no matter how long and carefully you research, then work on accepting that about yourself. Don’t make your fear her problem by lashing out or unfairly implying that she may be some sort of criminal for no good reason. Pause and ask yourself, has this woman actually done anything to me besides giving me a chance and asking me to follow normal client protocol?

Final thoughts

Safety goes both ways. Some Clients are nervous about getting scammed, whereas all Escorts are nervous about getting raped and murdered, which is something to bear in mind when navigating a meeting. However high your stakes are, ours unfortunately are always higher.

If you are still too nervous to meet an Escort, consider booking some Virtual Girlfriend Experiences instead.

I am an elegant, affectionate, sensual hedonist and elite, discreet dating companion... a blonde, ultrafeminine and authentically kinky English rose. I like to laugh, smile, flirt and play, whether for a moment’s welcome escape, a wild afternoon or an opulent evening for two… anywhere luxurious between London and Devon. If you would like to comment on this post or arrange a date, please email MissLillyWatson@Protonmail.com.

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